Here’s what masculinity looks like to a woman

Never before in our nation’s history have we studied what it means to be a man more than we have right now. Of course, we didn’t need to study it before; people knew what it meant to be a man.

But today, there’s so much propaganda surrounding gender that people are either confused as hell or they sit in silence with what they know to be true out of fear.

But confident men (and the women who love them) know that masculinity isn’t evil. It’s the narrative about it that’s evil.

Jordan Peterson sums it up perfectly:

“The dominant narrative in our culture is predicated on the assumption that the West is a tyrannical patriarchy. It has become acceptable in our time to put forward a version of history, the present and the future that is based on a deep hatred for men.

This is a very enervating, demotivating, discouraging story, as it takes what is best about the best young men — their desire for competence, contribution, cooperation, competition and success — and turns it into something indictable.”

There’s no question that the relationship between women and men took a nosedive at the exact time this propaganda took place. We turned men into mice by making them afraid to claim their manhood. They won’t let their alpha out because they’ve been conditioned to believe it’s bad. In reality, their alpha—their masculinity—is the very thing women crave.

“We get a lot of guys with ‘Nice Guy Syndrome’ [and] toxic shame,” notes Brian Begin, founder of The Fearless Man. “They’re nice to a fault, running around trying to people please so much they don’t even know who they are anymore.”

He adds, “For people to want to be sexual with each other, you need polarity. Most men and women today have become almost competitive for each other’s masculine and feminine, and no one’s taking a polarizing role.”

I’ve written extensively on what femininity looks like to a man. Here’s what masculinity looks like to a woman:

  • A man who stands tall and proud and who doesn’t wait to be told what to do.
  • A man who knows who he is and who isn’t afraid to share it with the world.
  • A man who looks deep into a woman’s eyes and doesn’t look away because it’s uncomfortable.
  • A man who’s confident without being cocky.
  • A man who’s passionate about something. Anything at all.
  • A man who’s fiercely protective of the woman he loves.

If you’re a man who’s struggling in his relationship, ask yourself which of the above you need to work on. Because it’s a rare woman who won’t respond to a man who embodies the traits above. And they are all attainable.

Want to learn more? Click here.

Suzanne Venker

Suzanne is an author, columnist and relationship coach committed to helping women let go of cultural beliefs that undermine their happiness in life and in love.
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