Yes, I also work with singles who are in a relationship and who are trying to decide whether to stay or to go.
You should first be aware that there are very few regulations on coaching, so make sure you do your homework. There are countless relationship coaches “out there,” but very few who have a background like mine of transitioning from being a prolific writer on marriage and family (as well as a cultural commentator on TV) to becoming a marriage coach. What that means is that it's easy to learn a great deal about me and my views by scanning the web. By the time people contact me, they know a lot about my views and my personality style. That alone makes me different and gives you a leg up in knowing a lot about me before we get down to business. That will not be the case with other coaches.
I'm also a straight shooter, which means I don't waste your time or mine. You'll hear things from me right from the get-go that may be hard to absorb but will effect immediate change. And isn't that why you're here?
Great question. So here’s the deal: While you get the gist of my approach to love from both my podcast and my books, putting these concepts into action is far from an overnight process. It typically requires a mentor or a coach to implement.
For instance, let’s say you’ve read The Alpha Female’s Guide to Men & Marriage (which I highly recommend)! This is not a book you can read once and then poof, your marriage is stronger. My message about the male-female dance is all about forming a new mindset, as well as new habits. It requires time and persistence and daily application.
Your current attitude and habits are automatic. They were developed over years and years of absorbing your parents’ model, as well as cultural narratives. Either one or both have likely undermined your ability to be successful in love.
Undoing the damage requires not just an awareness that you need to do so but consistent help in putting your new attitude and approach into action. You’ll need to apply them daily, and you will make many missteps along the way. Many.
It is therefore critical to your success to have a coach who can help you succeed in this new way of relating to the opposite sex. I want you to hit the marriage jackpot as much as you do. Let's do it together!
You will leave each session with something specific to work on for that week. You will also have access to me via WhatsApp, a free and reliable form of texting and voicemail, between sessions to help lift you up when you stumble—which you will. That’s totally expected.
I work with mainly married (or engaged) couples, but I will work with any couple that's knee-deep in a relationship and who are having conflicts and concerns. (See the first two sessions listed on my coaching page.)
Not only can you, I require it—and here’s why. I've found that spouses feel freer to talk (plus they get more time) when the other spouse isn’t there. This, in turn, allows me to get the full scope of what’s going on in their relationship.
But the main reason I do this is because building a better marriage rests with the individual. Too many couples go to marriage counseling to get the other person to change. That is not effective, and this is not marriage counseling. This is coaching.
It’s my job to help individuals learn new ways of thinking and behaving to produce the desired result. My seeing couples individually does not mean you have a private space to blame your spouse. When you tell me something, it cannot be in confidence (unless you’re in harm’s way, in which case I would pass you on to the appropriate expert for help). I will freely share what we discuss one-one-one with your spouse as a means of helping him or her understand your needs and concerns. I have found this method to be the most effective.
Yes, you can do a payment plan if necessary.