Ep. 33: When She Earns More

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Gender role reversals rarely workIt is well documented that when wives earns more, marriages suffer. In fact, according to one new study, married women who reach the corporate pinnacle are twice as likely to be divorced three years after their promotion to CEO as compared to their male counterparts.

Andre and I delve into why this is the case and offer solutions for what high earning women can do to calibrate the role reversal.

That being said, there’s almost always a price to pay for reversing the natural roles of hunter/gatherer—even in 2020.

The Takeaway:

  1. When women out earn men, the male/female dynamic, in dating and marriage, is turned on its head
  2. There’s a price to pay for reversing the roles of hunter/gatherer
  3. Men are motivated to provide for women. When you support your man, he becomes motivated to be successful
  4. Let the man lead- If you want your relationship to work, women must drop the “manliness”
  5. The instinctual drive for a man it to provide and protect
  6. Married women are twice as likely to divorce, three years after they’ve been promoted.
  7. Men and women work for different reasons and it DOES MATTER WHO MAKES MORE

 

Suzanne’s Solutions 

If you’re not married:

  • Think about what you truly want in your life
  • Find a man with desire and drive, even if he doesn’t have a college degree (Don’t try to find your “equal” in educational terms)
  • Make sure you are dating men that have the same life philosophy/value system
  • Don’t wait so long to get married

If you’re married:

  • Understand the money you bring to the table is 50% HIS, Just as the money HE earns is 50% yours.
  • All major purchases should be decided together and discussed
  • Never hide money (This is something women do more often than men)
  • Don’t be the bookkeeper
  • If you make more than your husband does, put aside the extra income for retirement or invest it

Suzanne Venker

Suzanne is an author, columnist and relationship coach committed to helping women let go of cultural beliefs that undermine their happiness in life and in love.
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